Mariah Carey being tapped as the latest subversive brand ambassador for perennial equality-campaigning MAC Cosmetics is a bit like waking up to find the maiden bundle of college friends you acquired when opening your Facebook account in 2007 had attended ‘An Evening With Oprah” in your home town the evening prior.
You know you should have since culled all ties with and upgraded to a more premium fixture on your daily life circuit, but being delivered a rude reminder that perhaps you’ve otherwise moved on to an affiliation with a different type of preacher – yes, your Soul Cycle instructor counts – and makeup upgrade to slap on your face, would conveniently now force you to do so.
In an effort to effortlessly execute a cheery 90’s throwback just in time for the holidays, MAC has temporarily borrowed Mimi’s face for the launch of its limited edition, “All I Want For Christmas Is You”, lipstick, which simultaneously reminds you that all Carey likely wants from Santa is current beau, millionaire James Packer, and his bank account.
MAC, which was established in Toronto by makeup artist and photographer Frank Toskan and beauty salon owner Frank Angelo, sharpened its commitment to supporting the HIV/AIDS organizations in response to the epidemic in 1994, a year after Carey dropped Billboard chart-topping smash hit, Music Box, which contained every TV producer’s godsend – the teary ballad “Hero”, also referred to as the soundtrack to any montage recap of the world’s latest natural disaster.
The shimmery nude lipstick is as likely to leave your pout as unremarkable as the recent Ellen interview with ex-hubby Nick Cannon waxing lyrical about co-parenting and unconditional love. In what appears to be a PR-refresh instigated by a 22-year old communications associate that’s just updated her beauty bag from Maybelline to MAC, other fading stars are using the holiday downtime to remind fans they still exist. Oprah would like to remind you – by way of a bossy down under bright-lights tour – that she has created an unparalleled connection with people around the world for more than 25 years (though all we remember was Tom Cruise jumping madly like a little cricket on her couch). Her rap sheet advertisement for the press tour lists her accomplishments like a public CV, as part of what one might mistake for a half-assed effort to land a new job. Quite modestly, Oprah labels herself as: global media leader, philanthropist and – wait for it – “one of the most respected and admired figures today”.
Carey, who no doubt Oprah was listening to in the green room backstage before her latest gig, has described the lipstick’s color as a “beautiful champagne shimmer” designed to flatter all skin tones, probably inspired by the all kinds of champagne she consumed while making the executive decision on its hue. MAC’s decision to ping Carey as the face of its supercharged December campaign is an interesting choice, given its partnered with game-changing advocates such as Lady Gaga, Miley Cyrus and Rihanna, in the past. Mimi might, in fact, have a strong opinion about gender equality and LGBT rights, but is likely more interested in a BLT sandwich than pushing the envelope on anything else.
But, MAC might just be testing the waters with its mature-age 90s reference, as it has a full Mariah x MAC Beauty Icon collection slated to drop next year.
“She exudes elegance, glamour, sophistication, and a sense of fun, MAC Creative Director James Gager has said of the partnership. “Her ‘All I Want’ lipstick is the perfect frosty holiday shade and her Beauty Icon collection will be everything you think of when you think MAC and Mariah.” The only correlation I can muster to make between Carey and the fiercely bold makeup brand, is by word association with the top selling burger at McDonalds, and that’s before discounting the fact that the only derivative of Mariah I would feel comfortable passing over my lips is a cocktail named after her at her local bar in L.A.
While it’s an odd coupling, MAC might have succeeded if their goal was to invoke a warm feeling of nostalgia among its loyal customers during a time of uncomfortable grief around the globe, and hey, she’s still a sellout at New York’s Beacon Theatre this week – because even the most jaded among us can’t turn down the annual Christmas CD spend (choice your poison between her and Michael Buble, who comes out of retirement to peddle ‘It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas,” every time his assistant instructs him to don a red tie and do so).
The brand’s infamous slogan, “VIVA MAC!” suggests a form of salute to longevity, and in this case, the solid duration of Carey’s vocal career, which has survived more stumbles than the seemingly unbreakable stardom cult of Oprah.
In any case, it’s a more fortuitous selection than pharmaceutical CEO Martin Shkreli, who faced global backlash earlier this year for hiking up the price of HIV medication Daraprim from $13.50 to $750 per pill and was just outed as the $2 million buyer of Wu Tang’s sole release of their new album, “Once Upon a Time in Shaolin,” which he has chosen to never listen to, unless, you know, Taylor Swift feels like popping by for a #squadgoals jam. Perhaps in the case of Shkreli, a dose of Carey and her frothy, tipsy holiday cheer, couldn’t hurt his public image.
So come on Mariah baby, slip a sable under the tree for me, just not your shimmery new MAC lipstick, or a discounted stock copy of your razzy silver screen disaster, Glitter. Because there’s no amount of eggnog that will get me drunk enough to endure that.
