Do not stay at the Hotel Rivington with your parents on the 4th of July, during which you will witness your father will performing the turtle on the floor of the hotel’s rooftop bar while engaged in a competitive dance-off with a 22-year old in a tube top to ‘Call Me Maybe’, surrounded by a circle of partygoers eagerly capturing the mortifying scene on their iPhones.
If you do, be prepared to accept the penance of a month of religiously checking Google for a viral YouTube video of said public event.
The towering 20-story glass and aluminum boutique hotel sits in stark contrast to the gritty surrounds of the historic tenement-style buildings and seedy nightlife scene of the Lower East Side – it’s not often you list ‘adjacent pizza, kebab and taco stands’ as key factors on the top of your lust list when selecting your digs for a staycation in the city.
To compensate for its less-chic neighbors, the hotel’s entrance features luxurious, red carpet and futuristic white arches, the experience of which walking through almost feels like a cleansing treatment before entering an upscale spa, the kind of place The Jetsons might visit if Jane grew up to take an unpaid fashion internship in the city.
A quick elevator ride completes the detoxifying process as the doors open to the concierge desk and relaxation zone, where you can sip a complementary happy hour wine as you spy on hipsters trying their hardest to look like they’d rather be in Brooklyn through the room’s floor-to-wall windows.
Minimalist chic is key in this modern, urban abode, with rooms providing stunning views of the Financial District, downtown bridges and the Midtown towers.
The sleek aesthetic continues in the rooms’ interior, which feature crisp white duvets on comfy Tempur-Pedic mattresses, large flat-screen TVs and boxy armchairs – a perfect place to dump your swag before heading down for happy hour.
For when it’s time to put on your dancing shoes, the majestic glass penthouse rooftop bar offers panoramic views of the city (and also your dancing father, if he’s four Peronis and a brandy in and hiding from your disapproving mother).
Off-piste, the hotel is surrounded by a plethora of bars and nightclubs sure to fit even the oddest body clock. Hair of the Dog will remind you of everything wrong with the American fraternity scene, while the pricy cocktail bar directly opposite will have you regretting you trading in for your $3 Coors Light for an overpriced and incorrectly made Negroni.
While Hotel Rivington’s snug hotspot location may not appeal to the older traveler looking for a quiet haven in the Big Apple, for younger, undercover luxury travelers seeking to pretend to slum it among the cool kids or the party animal father keen to flex his dancing chops, it definitely ticks all the boxes.
